I used to think that seeking God for the ​“right” decision was a sign of spiritual maturity. My discernment process usually looked like asking God to highlight an answer on a multiple-choice question of my design: Should I choose A, B, or C?

I discovered, however, that for me this kind of seeking had less to do with true godliness and more to do with wanting to have the right answer — an answer I could be assured would lead to success since, after all, God gave it to me. Instead of being a way of surrender, it was a way of attempting to be in control.

So when I heard Steve Macchia on the podcast this week talking about ​“Practicing a Preference for God,” I smiled. Because he’s getting at the heart of mature spiritual discernment: becoming the kind of person who prefers God, who knows when something ​“smells” of the Kingdom, who wants what God wants.

Sometimes God’s presence is palpable. Sometimes what God wants is so apparent you’d have to try not to see it. Steve calls this ​“the obvious,” and such clarity is a wonderful thing.

For the rest of life, more practice is needed: practice in slowing down and quieting our souls, practice in acknowledging the reality of God’s presence right here, and practice holding our multiple-choice options — and even our questions — with open hands.

God is too good to be a vending machine for right answers. God is our Father and our friend who wants to grow our character and our love so we can be people who naturally want what God wants.

So, is it good to seek God’s advice regarding particular decisions? Absolutely. But first, let’s seek God.

Then, in the context of a Christian community seeking to know God’s heart, we can present our questions and discern God’s response together. That response might be, ​“I like Option A.” Or, ​“I like all your options. What do you want to do?” Or God may say, ​“Toss your options; I’ve got an idea that’ll blow your mind.”