Dear friends,

I’ve battled mild depression for years. On occassion, it’s been more than mild.

Two years ago, on the day before recording an album I’d put off for years, I awoke with debilitating despair and heaviness. For those who haven’t experienced something like this, it is difficult to describe — there is almost a physical weight on you that makes even the most mundane activities impossible. You can’t simply ​“snap out of it.”

I did manage to sit up in bed and do the last thing I felt like doing: reach for my guitar and begin forming an honest song. As I gave words and melody to the heaviness, it began to lift. 

Scripture records that when David strummed, King Saul got relief from inner torment. Then when David became King, he found relief from his own inner turmoil by crafting it into honest prayer-songs — songs God’s people have been praying and singing ever since.

The Psalms offer different approaches for different seasons. Some start in the dark: My God, My God, why have you forsaken me? Some start in the light: The Lord is my Shepherd. No matter the approach, they magnify God — they enlarge God in our field of focus — without shying away from the reality of pain.

Memorizing a psalm — like Psalm 23 — and bringing its words and images to mind has a powerful shaping effect on us. And that power increases when it’s also on our lips. When I say aloud, He restores my soul, my mind and body have something ​“tangible” to come into agreement with. 

The song that emerged from that difficult day two years ago ends with a refrain from Psalm 118: ​“This is the day that the Lord has made; I will rejoice and be glad in it.”

As a kid, I sang these words in a clappy-happy church song. As an adult, the words carry more weight. I see now that the Psalmist’s rejoicing came only after his struggle and sorrow: 

Hemmed in and with no way out… God tested me, he pushed me hard… This is the day that the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it.